Pack your lederhosen, or your dirndl as the case may be, because the Exploitation Cinema line is pulling into West Germany to showcase a duo of sex films from Hubert Frank, the man behind Hochzeitsnachts Report (WEDDING NIGHT REPORT) and Jagdrevier der scharfen Gemsen (HAS ANYBODY SEEN MY PANTS?), and Walter Boos, whose credits including six SCHOOLGIRL REPORT films (Parts 3, 5, 9, 10, 12 and 13) and Liebe in drei Dimensionen (LOVE IN 3D).
Another entry in the long line of German “Report” films, LONELY WIVES (Zum zweiten Frühstück: Heiße Liebe) stars Frank Glaubrecht as a reporter who after witnessing his neighbors fighting over the wife’s sexual neglect, decides to write an expose on “sexual widows”; married women whose husbands do not satisfy their physical needs. Starting his project across the street, Frank drops in on his nubile neighbor (the absolutely gorgeous Barbara Nielsen) unannounced, disrupting her topless sunbathing session to ask a few a questions. Agreeing to his interview, Barbara details a tiring life of spousal abandonment, broken only by the occasional sexual encounter with random men. Such a tale becomes a running theme throughout Frank’s investigation as time and again his interviewees regale stories of sexual flings labeled as justified due to the fact that their husbands are never around.
Released in the U.S. by International Producers Corp, the same folks who brought us SWINGING WIVES (Der neue heiße Sex-Report - Was Männer nicht für möglich halten), LONELY WIVES doesn’t have much of a plot but what it lacks in character development it makes up for in bare breasts. Ewa Stromberg (VAMPIROS LESBOS) plays the spouse of a millionaire whose frequent business trips are apparently reason enough to have sex with the gardener and play backgammon in the nude with the beautiful and busty Dorit Henke (LOVE IN 3D). As Helena, Ingrid Steeger (SCHOOLGIRL REPORT PART 5 - WHAT ALL PARENTS SHOULD KNOW) is at first jealous of her boyfriend's nautical rendezvous with gal pal Lisa (Rena Bergen, HOUSEWIVES REPORT) but her envy quickly subsides once she is wrapped in the arms of Lisa’s beau Thomas. Eventually neither her boyfriend nor Thomas can satisfy her desires so Helena decides to cut out the middle man (or any man for that matter) and schedule her secretive sex sessions with Lisa alone! Ingeborg Steinbach (SCHOOLGIRL REPORT 3 - WHAT PARENTS FIND UNTHINKABLE) plays another topless sunbather who, thanks to a sleazy janitor, meets a tragic and fully nude end and the lovely Eva Garden (BOTTOMS UP) gets to display her tan lines as the living model for a sex educator.
When his benefactor (Joachim Hackethal) threatens to pull funding due to low customer turnout, strip club owner Alois (Josef Moosholzer) hits the road bound for Ostfriesen in search of fresh talent. Tagging along for the ride are Lisa (Margot Mahler), a wannabe stripper eager to have her moment in the spotlight, and Theo (Frank Nossack), a ladies man eager to bed every country girl he can get his hands on. Unfortunately for Theo, his girl Nelly (the cute as a button Alena Penz, NAUGHTY NYMPHS) isn't about to let her man run off to Eastern Friesland by himself and decides to follow the trio on their “Ostfriesen’s Got Talent” road show.
And there you have it. Packed with puns and brimming with boobs, what little plot SORRY, WRONG BEDROOM (Der Ostfriesen-Report) has is there simply as an excuse to have young women undress. Low brow by nearly anyone’s standards, BEDROOM makes no allegations to the contrary and as a result is actually quite entertaining. The picture starts out rather hilariously with the strip club's resident magician getting it on with one of the clubs ladies (Karin Hofmann). Letting nothing get in the way of his “performance”, the magician pulls birds, flowers and rabbits out of his sleeves throughout his magical “act”. Some of the birds fly off. Others don't. And the little bunny rabbit, left with no where else to go, just sits there and sniffs Karin's nipples! BEDROOM is filled with such ludicrous sexual set-ups, most of which pay off thanks to the inclusion of a female cast who were clearly up for anything. Alexandra Bogojevic’s (SALON KITTY) jaw may resemble that of a big mouth bass but her bosom favors the peaks and valleys of the Black Forest Mountain Range. The trio’s first recruit, Alexandra’s easy nature and willingness to jump into bed with anyone, even the portly Josef Moosholzer, with little to no persuasion proves to be local trait as nearly every milking maid the trio comes across is more than willing to share in the bounty of their land.
While BEDROOM reviles in showcasing the finer point of Ostfriesen’s ladies, the picture's humor does at times seem preoccupied with exposing its residents as a community of oblivious fools. There are a number of gags that are more likely to entice a groan rather than a guffaw due to their tired and, quite frankly bigoted nature. Many of the film's sight gags are reenactments of lame "Polish Jokes", such as one scene in which an elderly gentleman holds a light bulb in place while four other men turn his chair to screw it in. Neither original nor funny, the picture losses steam each time it trips over such failed attempts at humor. Thankfully when ever things start to lag there is a gratuitous nude scene around the corner to place the film back on track. Despite such humorless hiccups, BEDROOM must have struck a cord and garnered quite a profit in its homeland as Walter Boos would film a sequel, Der Ostfriesen-Report 2, the following year.
LONELY WIVES and SORRY, WRONG BEDROOM have seen DVD releases overseas - WIVES
in 2006 through universum film and BEDROOM in 2008 through WVG Medien as part
of their Erotik Classics line - but make their stateside digital debut with
this release. LONLY WIVES is presented uncut in a 1.78:1 aspect ratio with anamorphic
enhancement, remastered in HiDef from the original CRI. Skin tones appear smooth
to the touch, with coloring as a whole appearing true, however the image does
lean to the dark side. The print features little in the way of debris, and grain,
while present, is kept in check. The mono English dub is a little soft but displays
no grating imperfections. BEDROOM is presented fullframe in what is labeled
as “internet favorite portable grindhouse”, which is to say the
transfer is taking from an English dubbed video source. Suffering from tape
rolls, discolorization and an overall murky sheen, BEDROOM’s visual and
audio presentation are adequate at best. A trailer for LONELY WIVES serves as
this release's sole extra.
A rambunctious pairing, Code Red’s WIVES/BEDROOM double bill is a treasure trove of sexploitation shenanigans, topless women and scene after scene of softcore flirtation. Overlooking a few technical faults and at least one questionable marketing tactic (the cases back copy makes a remark that could actually alienate a portion of its target demographic, i.e. males with computer access) this particular entry in the “Exploitation Cinema Double Feature” line is one worth noting. (Jason McElreath)
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