SCHOOLGIRL
REPORT VOLUME #6: WHAT PARENTS WOULD GLADLY HUSH UP (1973) Director: Ernst Hofbauer
Impulse Pictures
SCHOOLGIRL
REPORT VOLUME #6: WHAT PARENTS WOULD GLADLY HUSH UP (1973) Ernst Hofbauer was a busy
man in the first half of the 1970’s. From the start of the decade on through
to 1975, he helmed over 20 films, including the first eight entries in the Schulmädchen-Report
series. Actually most of Hofbauer's projects during this time tend to fall in
line with the investigative "report” film, such as SWINGING WIVES
and Mädchen beim Frauenarzt, also known as GIRLS AT THE GYNECOLOGIST. By
the time it came to directing volume six in the thirteen strong series, Ernst's
day to day duties must have seemed like second nature. And, I would imagine,
a Hell of a lot of fun.
After Sibylle (Sonja Jeannine) and Achim (Bert Lock) get caught having sex under
the piano in the music room, the two love birds are brought before facility
and staff to be reprimanded. Grilled over their illicit behavior, the young
lovers stick up for themselves by suggesting that their conduct would be considered
tame when compared to the rest of the school's population. Take for instance
the case of Ingrid (Marie Ekorre) and Miss Lensing (Shirley Corrigan). Ingrid's
lesbian lust for her striking teacher leads the beguiling brunette to act far
beyond rational thought. Throwing herself at her teacher, Ingrid begs to feel
the warm breath and breasts of her instructor; however her sexual advances prove
mute, as Fräulein Lensing clearly doesn’t swing that way. She would
much rather spend time with the school's married German teacher. Rebuffed, Ingrid
tries her hand at blackmail but before the affair has a chance to blow up, the
whole ordeal is covered up by the school's administration.
Further
driving home the school’s ignorance of its own repute, Sibylle recounts
the time she stayed mum after being accosted at school by several boys her senior.
Her ordeal then (somehow) leads to the story of Hans (Kurt Meinicke), the campus
lady-killer, known for having bedded almost ever girl in school. With several
female classmates on the down low, completely unaware of each other, Hans undeniably
has a good thing going. That is until his so called best friend Leopold (Sven
Dolan) decides to set up his best bro for a fall, after a scorned lover of Hans
approaches him with an irresistible offer.
On a lighter note, though equally disturbing, the school appears to have a problem
with its outsourced help as well, as shown by the randy antics of a hired window
washer played by Schulmädchen-Report regular, Rinaldo Talamonti. While
an all girl health class gets a lecture in the finer points of the male anatomy,
a virile, if not overly goofy fellow, takes advantage of the teacher’s
poor vision by sneaking into the classroom and posing as one of the girls. Once
distracted, the horny janitor takes three of the class's students behind a conveniently
placed partition for a bit of private tutoring.
Stepping
away from the school momentarily, one faculty member recounts a tale that took
place in a village just south of the school. A shocking tale that involved a
young girl named Marlies (Sonja Embriz) who was forced into prostitution by
her creepy ass father. After catching his daughter mere moments before losing
her virginity to a nearby farmer, the old man decides to use his daughter's
purity as means of erasing his debts. Marlies reluctantly complies with her
father's request at first but it isn’t long before word of her new occupation
gets around the village, causing her much embarrassment and potentiality ruining
any chance of one day finding a true companion.
Coming full circle, the final tale recounts the passionate affair between a
fencing instructor, Mr. Wedekind (Reiner Brönneke), and his nubile star
pupil, Lilo (Ulrike Butz). After a rather steamy locker room rendezvous, the
two begin to find time in which to meet in private to continue their studies.
While hot and adventurous, their affair proves to be too much to handle for
Mr. Wedekind, who decides to break things off between the two of them, much
to Lilo’s dismay. A complete wreck, Lilo collapses in the middle of the
road in front of on coming traffic but, luckily for her, is swooped up by the
a young man (Achim Neumann) who is more than willing to take Mr. Wedekind’s
place.
Of
all of the SCHOOLGIRL REPORT films released stateside on DVD thus far –
Numbers 1 through 5 of the series are currently available through Impulse Pictures
- #6 might just have the most eye catching cast. The picture certainly opens
with a bang, as the first segment not only features former Penthouse Pet of
the Month (March, 1974) Marie Ekorre, but her future costar from AROUND THE
WORLD WITH FANNY HILL, Shirley Corrigan to boot, and in a lesbian tryst no less.
Marie and her giant eyelashes light up the screen for her extended segment which,
truth be told, shows very little in the way of lesbian love, but not for her
character's lack of trying. Shirley, who the previous year stared opposite Paul
Naschy in DOCTOR JEKYLL AND THE WEREWOLF, receives the most “in the buff”
screen time and looks nothing short of amazing in every frame. Sonja Jeannine
also proves to be a delectable delight as Sibylle, the young lady whose extracurricular
activities provides the loose thread which strings together the film's tantalizing
vignettes. Sonja also displays her talents in Fruhreifen-Report, shot the same
year by Hofbauer and would again act for the director a year later in the delirious
German/Hong Kong co-production, ENTER THE SEVEN VIRGINS. Other notable beauties
include Ulrike Butz (THE DEVIL’S PLAYTHING), a stand out in the film's
obligatory shower scene, and Sonja Embriz whose clothing appears to be the center
piece of a game of musical chairs, as in each proceeding scene another article
seems to turn up missing. Swedish sexpot Christina Lindberg even gets in on
the action as scenes from prior Schulmädchen-Report, including Teil 4 in
which she headlined a segment, are incorporated into the picture as a means
of driving home the film's investigative angle.
Released in the U.S. through Hemisphere Pictures as CAMPUS PUSSYCATS - “They
have the campus franchise on wild pleasure!” -, Impulse Pictures presents
SCHOOLGIRL REPORT Volume #6 uncut in its original German language. The film's
anamorphic widescreen (1.66:1) transfer is quite solid, though coloring is slightly
soft. Sporadic debris rarely deflects from the ongoing action. However, reel
changes, which are marked by a large white box, then circle, do jump out quite
blaringly due to their size. The mono audio track bares little to complain about,
as both dialogue and Gert Wilden’s original score are easy to follow,
as are the newly translated, removable English subtitles which bare no errors
and flow naturally. Save for a chapter menu, there are no extras features.
Packed with enough eye candy to give you ocular diabetes, fans of the SCHOOLGIRL
REPORT films should have no qualms about picking this one up, as it is on par
with Impulse Pictures previous releases. I for one can't wait for them release
volume #7. And #8. And #9 .... (Jason
McElreath)